


Beautiful

by amberandmetal



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Aunt Pepper Potts, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Good Steve Rogers, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Mild Sexual Content, Praise Kink, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-16
Updated: 2018-01-16
Packaged: 2019-03-05 15:39:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13390941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amberandmetal/pseuds/amberandmetal
Summary: Basically Reader hates her appearance and have a hard time dealing with it. Enter Steve.





	Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> So this was a painful thing for me to write since this is basically my own emotions regarding myself and how I look. I had a bad day and a lot of not so nice thoughts about myself and I decided to pour all of that into this.  
> It has a sweet ending i promise, and if you're having one of those days when you don't like yourself very much I genuinely believe reading this can be a comfort.
> 
> Hope you'll like it♡  
> Come find me on [tumblr](https://waywardkitten.tumblr.com/)

You felt the tears caress and wet your cheeks as you watched the same tears fall from the eyes of your looking glass twin staring back at you.

Different night, same story. 

The night had been a blur of tuxedos, suits and evening gowns, one pretty face after the other; blinding white teeth between perfectly painted lips, smiling and greeting you as Pepper had made the rounds with you so she could introduce her niece because it was “ _The polite thing to do_ ” and “ _How else are you going to make friends?_ ”

It had been a never ending onslaught of slim faces, cheekbones that went for miles, jawlines that probably could cut more than glass, perfectly plucked eyebrows and flawless skin.

You wanted to seep through the earth never to return.

You’d lived in the tower for quite some time now. When your folks split you had to make the best of a bad situation but after years of moving from place to place and taking minimum wage jobs that never paid out you’d found yourself at a loss; and with nowhere left to go you’d finally swallowed your pride and called your aunt. She and Tony had taken you in without any questions asked and Tony had stocked your very own room with anything you might need — and you were forever in their debt.

Pepper had not only been kind enough to take you in but also not say a word about her brother — your father— and the fact that he’d bailed on you without as much as an explanation or even a goodbye.

She kept her opinions to herself, knowing it was hard on you as it was, but everytime his name was voiced out loud she still couldn’t help the thin tight lipped line forming her mouth.

_Mouth.._

The thought drew you back into the present, your eyes landing on your own in the mirror. Your gaze traced the lines and curves of your lips as they trembled slightly with the sobs you couldn’t quite hold in.

You felt ridiculous. A grown woman crying over her appearance. There were worse things in the world than an unattractive face.

Still.. you couldn’t let it go.

Every time you were looked upon you felt shame and a deep desire to become invisible. It was like the look of another burned your very skin making it feel raw.

You looked up, scanning your face; your way too plump cheeks, your unusually shaped nose, strange eyes and abnormal forehead. If you hadn’t already been crying, you would’ve started then.

The women at the gala had been beautiful, gorgeous, _ethereal_ . And you- you they had squeezed into a pale lime green strapless gown that had done nothing to hide your not so slim nor fit upper arms and far from toned back and shoulders. You’d pleaded with your aunt to let you wear something to cover up but as you’d feared she’d just told you “ _Nonsense, you’re beautiful_ ” and that had been the end of that.

Your legs started to ache from sitting on the floor but you couldn’t make yourself move. You were entranced by the vision in the mirror you despised so deeply, much like in the same morbid way you can’t look away from a car crash.

    “Y/n?”

You didn’t even register the soft call of your name. You just stared into your own eyes, racking your brain after any clue as to how you ended up looking like this. Your parents were beautiful, both of them, so it didn’t make a lick of sense. If it hadn’t been for you having the same twisted sense of humour as your father or your mother’s loopey intelligence you would’ve called adoption. But no, you were most definitely their daughter. The rather unusual colour of your eyes could attest to that if nothing else.  
    “Y/n? You in here?”

You didn’t even have time to react, much less wipe your face. Tall, blonde, beautiful and looking very much concerned Steve Rogers had appeared behind you, worried eyes connecting with yours through the mirror.  
    “ _Oh, Steve.._ hi..uhm, just gimme a minute”, you stammered, putting your arm up to shield your wet, red and puffy face from view as you reached for a tissue.

He surprised you by crouching down behind you and grabbing both your arms softly but not pulling at them.  
    “Hey, hey.. what’s wrong?”

You were thankful he didn’t sound the least condescending, only worried. It was a small comfort though since you thought you’d probably implode from the embarrassment. 

Steve was the epitome of perfection— it was something you both hated and loved about him. You had studied him for months trying to find a flaw, chancing a glance every opportunity you got, even opting to observe his training sessions with the meek excuse that you found it educating.

Steve, being the kind altruistic person that he was, had no problems with that, and the weekly sparring sessions between the Avengers had become your favourite time of the week. And now Steve was there; in your bedroom; sitting behind you; while you were crying.  
    “Steve, really.. I’m fine..I-..I just” 

He slumped down then and let his long legs sprawl out on either side of you.  
    “What? You just what?”

He kept his voice soft as he spoke. He let go of your arm with one hand to pull the curtain of hair covering your face behind your ear, your arms resting on your bent up knee still covering most of you.  
    “I’ve never seen you like this, has something happened? What’s going on?” 

You just shook your head silently, hoping that he would eventually give up and go away.  An unsanctioned sob racked your body then and Steve surprised you by moving closer and moving those big arms around you in a 104 degree embrace. You shivered, the warmth pebbling your cold skin.  
    “Why are you here? Why are you being so nice?” 

Your voice sounded small, pathetic, but you didn’t have the strength in you to care at this point. The solid weight of Steve’s head fell softly on you as he rested his chin on your shoulder.  
    “You disappeared the moment we got back without a word. Thought I’d come and check on you” 

Making sure you wiped your face on the sleeve of the hoodie you’d put on the moment you entered your room, you slowly looked up from behind your arm, peering warily at the Captain’s reflection.

He smiled, looking right back at you through the mirror  
    “Hi there, long time no see”

You managed a slightly exasperated huff of a chuckle. You still didn’t want him to see you and you hadn’t gotten any bit closer to figuring out what the hell Steve Rogers was doing sitting on your bedroom floor, holding you while you sobbed with self pity. But you did manage to decide that you hadn’t got the strength in you to care anymore.  
    “Hi”, you whispered back. 

A quick smile.  
    “So you gonna tell me what’s going on?”

    “I’m ugly” 

The words were out of your mouth so fast you didn’t have the time to stop yourself. You squeezed your eyes shut on a groan. _Damn it_. You hid your face behind your arms again with a sigh, internally berating yourself.  
    “What?” 

He sounded so adorably confused you jerked your head up without having made any decision to do so. His brows were closely knitted together and his eyes wide as he stared at the reflection of the two of you.  
    “You’re no— “ 

    “Yes, I am. And don’t try to deny it.”

    “You’re beauti— “

    “Don’t. Please don’t. I’m not. And it becomes even more apparent being around you, all of you… I mean is there a criteria in the ‘Being a superhero’ checklist stating that you have to be gorgeous beyond logic?-... It’s just.. I know I’m not..that. Never have been, never will be. I’m a disproportionate mess with scars, cellulite, rolls and a face that should be covered in makeup 24/7. I’m sorry.. I don’t even know why I’m telling you this, I don— .. I shouldn’t even be telling you this.”

You couldn’t have stopped the pathetic rambling even if you’d wanted to. It was like suddenly you’d had enough of it, of feeling like this, thinking like that, it all just welled over and wouldn’t stop. You groaned, curling in on yourself further, a pink blush heating your cheeks. You were mortified.

Your entire body went rigid when you felt a warm cheek and a soft pair of lips nuzzling slow and light against your neck.  
    “Can _I_ talk now?”

You nodded jerkily, not sure of what else to do.  
    “Good, and I need you to be quiet until I am finished, no protesting and no running away, deal?” 

Your nerves were running amok but still, against better judgement, you nodded again.  
    “I think you are beautiful.. _ah, ah,_ no, no protesting remember?.. You _are_ beautiful and it is unfathomable to me that you can’t see it, or that you can’t see the way I’ve been tripping over myself around you..”, your head snapped up. _What?_ “..are you really that clueless, Y/n? I am not exactly the most subtle fella..” 

You just stared at him in the mirror, scanning his face for any sign of insincerity and resigned to question your own sanity when you found none.

    “You do look unusual-” your eyes shot down at his words but he simply took a soft hold of your chin and tilted your face up again “- and that’s what makes you beautiful. I’m not saying conventional beauty is unattractive but it’s not the only way to be pretty. Stars are beautiful, but so are flowers, Christmas lights and sunsets and they look nothing alike-” you looked at him then, mouth suddenly dry as your mind kept spinning faster and faster for every word he told you “- and you forget, I think, that this-” he gestured to himself “-is not natural. I was small, sick and weak.. no dame would even look my way. So I know what it’s like wishing you were born as something else, but I’m telling while I had reason to feel that way, you do not.” 

He spoke gently and so softly it started to lull you into a sense of safety and calm that in some lonely corner of your mind both thrilled and jarred you.  
    “I’ve seen photos..”, you mumbled “..of you, pre-serum. I would’ve looked your way” 

Steve chuckled in your ear and tightened the embrace for a second, squeezing you lightly.  
    “That was different though, I was born with a disadvantage, you were not.” 

You threw your hands in the air lightly, suddenly feeling a bit exasperated  
    “But I’m not like— “ 

    “them”, he finished for you “so? I am around soldiers everyday, perfectly fit men and women, which is all good, but you- _you’re real_ . You are soft and the realest thing I have in my life. Nobody can ever play the Celebrity look alike game with you because there is no one that looks like you. Your beauty is your own, and it’s unique and it’s _wonderful_ ”

Tears were rolling down your face again but for a completely different reason. You weren’t sure you dared believe him but it felt so good to be enclosed in his warmth and just listen to his kind words softly rumbling in his chest.  
    “ _You_ are wonderful” 

You tore your eyes from the mirror to snap around and look at him and just as you did he sealed your mouths in a kiss.

A satisfied hum rose up from his throat as he molded his lips to yours and it completely short circuited your brain. You threw your arms around his neck and let yourself melt into it, not having the energy to second guess anything.

He turned you so your entire body was facing him and your legs stretched out over his thighs and around his body. You trembled slightly as he pulled you closer to him, connecting your cold frame to his heat.

Without as much as a huff of breath he got up, pulling you with him and carrying you to your bed. You squeaked at the first pull but then remembered _superhuman strength_ and decided to just be okay with it.

He dropped you down on the bed with one knee on the mattress, hovering over you. His eyes were dark and his pupils heavy with want.  
    “I can’t believe you don’t know how beautiful you are, how _good_..” you shivered at the word. Steve chuckled lowly “You like that, doll? Being told what a good girl you are? Because I won’t mind telling you again and again..”, he murmured, easily stripping you off your hoodie and then reaching for the zipper on the side of your dress. 

You froze.

Steve’s eyes suddenly looked uncertain, fingers still hovering just above the clasp above the zipper. You just stared wide-eyed, silently wondering if it were possible for your heart to literally break your bones and beat out of your chest.  
    “If you don’t wan— “

    “No!..no, I do, I do..it’s just..”. you gestured kinda vaguely towards yourself before you went on to cover your chest and stomach with your arms.

The look on Steve’s face softened and he got up on the bed towering over you on all fours. He locked eyes with you for only a second, a glint of mischief and mirth in his eyes that had your skin buzzing with nerves. Next thing you knew his lips were on your jawline, your neck and clavicle.  
    “I guess I’m just gonna have to show you then, won’t I?” 

You trembled slightly beneath him, brain overloaded with the sheer magnitude of trying to grasp the situation. You couldn’t believe what was happening, but happy that it did. You just prayed to whatever deity that he wouldn’t take one look at your body and run screaming the other way.

His lips had reached the upper hem of your gown and he made quick work of the clasp and zipper, inching it down slowly as he planted kiss after kiss along every new inch of skin that was revealed.  
    “Beautiful, soft, even your skin smell so good, sweetheart” 

You whined lowly in spite of yourself, hoping he wouldn’t hear you; but he wouldn’t even have had needed super hearing to hear the low desperate noises you were making and his eyes shot up at the sound.  
    “ _Beautiful_ ” 

His eyes glinted.

He kept working your dress down your body, slipping it off you slowly, kissing every inch by inch that got exposed. He groaned low in his chest at the sight of your bare chest, braless and naked, skin pebbling in the cool air.  
    “Can’t believe this, can’t believe I get to.. that you.. ah, _such a good girl_ , so sweet, so soft..exquisite, pretty, stunning, smell so good, _wonderful._  

You swallowed, your throat making a weird clicking noise as your saliva struggled down your dry throat. Every kiss on your exposed skin felt like he left a mark, that the kisses were etched into your skin where they tingled long after his lips moved lower.

He kept murmuring soft praises as he rained kisses all over your skin. He didn’t stop until he’d gotten your gown completely off and he had reached the arch of your foot, planting one last kiss there tenderly. He’d left you in nothing but your panties and the hairs on your skin standing on end in the cold seemed to remind him. He slowly made his way up your body, dragging his solid warm frame against you as he went, careful not to put too much of his weight on you.

When he finally was up by your head again you felt delirious with it; intoxicated; _drunk_. You managed to scramble your broken thoughts together enough to mumble out a quiet “Are you sure about this?”

He captured your lips with his, sucking lightly on your bottom lip before letting his teeth graze softly over it. He bit, nibbled and laved over your lips until they felt swollen and completely kissed out.  
    “Positive” 

That’s when you felt a hot warm tongue sliding across your lip and you eagerly opened up, surging upward to claim more of him. He smiled wide into the kiss, running his big hands all over your chest, arms and stomach. You hummed in pleasure and allowed yourself to just melt against him.

He angled his hips just so, the hard ridge of him pressing against your thigh, hot and hard.  A desperate moan escaped your mouth and he bit down on your bottom lip and tugged lightly before sliding his mouth across your cheek to your ear, his breath warm and damp against you.  
    “ _Like I said.. beautiful_ ”


End file.
